32

“I’m looking for something, I know.”

“Aren’t we all? Love, peace, security …”

“No, it is what I am here for – looking for something. That is what I was programmed for, and that is why I have … gaps. They knew I would meet people and talk to them, so they had to make it so there was nothing to fear – so that I could tell them nothing. They sent me to the wheel to watch and lie low …”

“Well, you’re certainly doing that all right. You couldn’t get much lower than what you’ve been getting up to with Julie the moment my back’s turned.”

“Your back is lovely. I would gladly do the same to you with your back turned.”

“Hey, that was a joke! My God, you’re really coming out of your shell, aren’t you! Nah, it’s not my scene, all that anal stuff. Thanks for the compliment, though. Actually, while we’re on the subject, which one of us do you find prettier?”

“You.”

“You’re so direct. You should say something like, “You’re both gorgeous, but Julie is more … such and such, and you’re more … so and so, and I really couldn’t choose between you. The two of you make up such a smorgasbord of delights that I can’t define where my pleasure really …”

“Ann. What are you talking about?”

“Sorry. This is how I get. You know I don’t chatter normally, but in bed, after sex, I get terribly talkative. Julie just goes to sleep on me, but you’re the first lover I’ve ever had who didn’t just turn over and start snoring. You see, I love all the foreplay and fooling around, but it’s this part that I really like, and I never get enough of it. Actually, I think I mostly have sex in order to feel like this afterwards. You don’t mind, do you?”

“I don’t mind. I will hold you forever if you want me to.”

“You really mean that, don’t you?”

“I cannot dissimulate, I told you before. It is true. No, I think it is true; I cannot really know anymore.”

“Do you like having Julie rubbing up against you over there?”

“Yes.”

“She’s sweet, isn’t she? She can be such a bitch sometimes, but in bed she’s like a little fieldmouse, full of tricks and so cute when she rolls up into a ball and falls asleep. I love her so much. Do you think it’s strange that I’m sharing her with you like this?”